<!DOCTYPE html>
<html>
<head>
<meta charset="UTF-8">
<title>Rare Awkward Moment by Momiji_Dysprosium</title>
<style type="text/css">

body { background-color: #ffffff; }
.CI {
text-align:center;
margin-top:0px;
margin-bottom:0px;
padding:0px;
}
.center   {text-align: center;}
.cover    {text-align: center;}
.full     {width: 100%; }
.quarter  {width: 25%; }
.smcap    {font-variant: small-caps;}
.u        {text-decoration: underline;}
.bold     {font-weight: bold;}
</style>
</head>
<body>
<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/29106786">Rare Awkward Moment</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Momiji_Dysprosium/pseuds/Momiji_Dysprosium'>Momiji_Dysprosium</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Awkwardness, Book 5: Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix, Cross-Posted on FanFiction.Net, Gen, Hermione's mouth, Mentioned Draco Malfoy, Not Beta Read, Poor Ron, Sassy Ginny Weasley, Sassy Harry Potter, Teenagers, The Golden Trio, snape snape severus snape - Freeform, winter holidays</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2021-01-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2021-01-31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-13 03:24:45</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,308</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/29106786</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Momiji_Dysprosium/pseuds/Momiji_Dysprosium</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>The youngest Weasley had her jaw open and her eyes were on Harry who could only blush and protest.<br/>"It's not as if I chose to dream of that."</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>29</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Rare Awkward Moment</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>A rare moment that could have happened in OOTP when we remembered that Harry and his friends are teenagers.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p> </p>
<p>Harry yawned before focusing back on Ron who was speaking of… something during breakfast. Hermione's lips were twitched in a rare smirk that woke up Harry's curiosity.</p>
<p>"What are you talking 'bout?" asked the boy-who-lived, as he chewed on a nice buttered toast made by Mrs. Weasley.</p>
<p>"The bouncing ferret." answered back both Ron and Hermione, their voice echoing a little too loudly at the table. Harry choked on his breakfast remembering his vivid… <em>Dream</em> last night.</p>
<p>"Wait, what? Eww, Ron. I mean, I understand, or wait, is there a curse in our room or-"</p>
<p>"What are you speaking about mate?" confusedly asked Ron.</p>
<p>Thankfully for them, or not, Hermione had managed to follow Harry's dirty thought. She laughed out loud, "Oh my, tell me you didn't, Harry!"</p>
<p>"Hermione! It's not a matter of choosing one's dream! You can't switch your dream!" protested Harry.</p>
<p>Ron looked back and forth between them. "What are we speaking about?"</p>
<p>Hermione giggled and Harry buried his head in his arms. "Well, you were telling about your bouncing ferret dream - or more precisely, your memory. Poor Malfoy, though, what Crouch Jr. did to him was cruel."</p>
<p>Ron rolled his eyes, "He's a death eater, of course, he'd do that. But I'm surprised he protected Harry."</p>
<p>"Honestly Ronald, he was disguised as Professor Moody, he wouldn't blow his cover." answered back their intelligent friend, and Harry had thought his prayers had finally been answered and they would change the subject.</p>
<p>His prayers had never been heard.</p>
<p>"Whatever 'Mione, I still don't understand your mysterious conversation with Harry."</p>
<p>A snort from Ginny, who was next to the twins and the other order members, stopped them. The golden trio turned as one to fix the girl with an inquiring stare. "What? Come on, isn't what Ron said ironic? You three always mutter between yourselves. What do you think we feel when we get glimpses of your conversations?" fiercely said Ginny, her brown gaze daring them to argue.</p>
<p>"Too true-" started a twin.</p>
<p>"-dear sister." finished the other one.</p>
<p>The three of them high fived each other as the Golden trio exchanged a questioning glance. "Well, the bouncing ferret is a known episode." argued weakly Hermione.</p>
<p>"Wait, but what was that thing with Harry?" cut Ron as Harry groaned.</p>
<p>"God Ron! He was thinking of a bouncing Malfoy." hissed Hermione.</p>
<p>The twins looked as confused as Ron, but sadly for Harry, Ginny's mind was as bad as Harry's. She choked and spat out her juice on one of the twins.</p>
<p>Sirius laughed loudly at George, and Mrs. Weasley glared at Ginny. The youngest Weasley had her jaw open and her eyes were on Harry who could only blush and protest.</p>
<p>"It's not as if I chose to dream of <em>that</em>."</p>
<p>"Of course not Harry." interrupted Hermione, "However, a part of you may be… Interested."</p>
<p>"Oh Merlin !" frustratingly exclaimed Harry, he could see the mischievousness in Ginny's eyes. "Hermione, that's wrong! You're wrong!"</p>
<p>The twins seemed to have caught one and laughed out loud. And perhaps hadn't Harry been so mortified, he'd have realized that some of the Order members were starting to listen to their <em>private</em> conversation.</p>
<p>" Actually Harry, professor Trelawney did explain to us that <em>dreams</em> show your inner thoughts and represent your inner battles." added Ginny with wiggling eyebrows.</p>
<p>The twins roared in laughter. But Ron didn't want to let it go, "But what's so funny?"</p>
<p>"For God's sake Ronald, Harry had a wet dream with Mal-"</p>
<p>"HERMIONE!" Shouted loudly Harry as he got up, the twins and Ginny were dying in laughter.</p>
<p>Ron gaped and his face paled drastically.</p>
<p>Hermione gasped and hid her mouth behind her hands.</p>
<p>"No, not the bouncing ferret." croaked weakly Ron.</p>
<p>Harry was red-faced and lost for words.</p>
<p>"Oh Harry, I'm so-"</p>
<p>"Save it." savagely cut Harry, "and shut it you three." added the Boy-who-lived to Ron's sibling.</p>
<p>"The only good thing I had, and you ruined it Harry!" continued Ron, his hand pushing back his plate - a first in the years they'd known each other!</p>
<p>"Oh Ronald, don't be dramatic. It <em>is</em> natural." sighed Hermione as she rolled her eyes.</p>
<p>"I don't care! I didn't need to know that my best friend, who sleeps right next to me, is not moaning because of Old Voldy but because of Ferret boy!"</p>
<p>Here, Harry should have done the mature thing - roll his eyes and go back to his breakfast - but Harry was a teen, indeed he rolled his eyes, however his mouth couldn't keep itself from running its course "Oh sure, because being in a Death eaters' orgy is better than Malfoy using you as a dildo."</p>
<p>The silence that followed that sentence was quite awkward. Harry's face flushed a deep red, Sirius's mouth was hanging open - his inbreed decorum momentarily failing him - Remus was watching Harry as if had announced he turned into a werewolf, though that would have been less awkward.</p>
<p>Ron was too pale for a red-head, Hermione's left eye twitched.</p>
<p>Mrs Weasley had never looked so shocked in the years he'd known her, no scratch that, he's sure the twins had managed to get a better reaction. Speaking of which, the mischievous pair had twinkling eyes and wore wicked smirks.</p>
<p>"Mate." whimpered Ron.</p>
<p>His saving grace came from the personified fire seating next to him, "Oh, I thought they were in the whole bdsm thing, what with them calling him Master and all, guess they could combine it?"</p>
<p>"GINERVA!" shouted Mrs. Weasley.</p>
<p>They should have ended it here, but Harry was decidedly in a good mood, "Guess so, though, with the whole snake thing, Old Voldy could be into bondage."</p>
<p>Mischievous light brown eyes met his laughing vivid green. Harry felt lighter as he joked with Ron's sister.</p>
<p>"Merlin, Harry! Reckon we could ask Snape for his hindsight in the matter?" continued Ginny as the twins grinned evilly. The others looked sick, but Sirius looked constipated - he was in a state between sickness and madness.</p>
<p>"Well, there must be a reason why he'd go to the dark side." darkly answered Harry, thinking about his future Occlu-something lesson with the git.</p>
<p>Ginny laughed, and even Ron snorted at that. Hermione looked scandalized.</p>
<p>"You mean -"</p>
<p>"there is a reason -"</p>
<p>"the dark side <em>wants</em> Snape?!" asked George.</p>
<p>"Scratch that, why would anyone want Snape?" finished Fred.</p>
<p>"Well, his hands are skilled as a potioneer." answered evilly Ginny, making Ron whimper. Mrs. Weasley looked quite scandalized, thank god Mr. Weasley wasn't here!</p>
<p>The rest of the order looked gobsmacked.</p>
<p>"Well, I think it must be his deep dark-chocolate tinted voice." added Harry to see if he could see a new shade of white on Ron.</p>
<p>"Now, I'll be able to explain to Professor McGonagall why you are failing potion, Potter." darkly answered a familiar velvet voice.</p>
<p>Harry's face paled, as he and his friends turned toward Snape, his dark eyes glinted evilly and his face was pulled in a sneer.</p>
<p>"Kingsley, the order meeting is going to start in a few minutes." informed the spy. "Perhaps, the... <em>children</em> should go upstairs." continued Snape as he focused on the still dazed Mrs. Weasley.</p>
<p>"Oh. You're right Professor." Mrs. Weasley turned on her fierce glare toward Ginny. "You are not off the hook yet young lady, you will reflect upon your action. And you will <em>all</em> be punished." finished the Weasley matriarch as her eyes fixed each of the children, one by one - a pale Ron gulped.</p>
<p>And for the first time, they all got up quickly to flee the kitchen before their life ended because of good old mischief. The twins actually dared to Apparate upstairs, disobeying an old rule in the face of danger.</p>
<p>As Harry and his friends reach the door, his Potter luck caught him.</p>
<p>"Oh, and detention Potter." snarked Snape.</p>
<p>Still, it was worth it.</p><hr/>
<p>
  <strong>- The End</strong>
</p>
  </div></div>
</body>
</html>